Dad

[Maverick]

Not darts related so I apologise , my father was diagnosed with inoperable liver cancer 6 weeks ago , biopsy followed and it was decided they may be able to contain it, 2 weeks later and a substantial decline in health, mobility and energy and he’s told up to 3 months without treatment , 6-9 months with but no longer strong enough to receive the brutal treatment that was 5 days ago . I’ve now spent the last two days at his bedside where he has been unconscious for 99% of that time........ surely as a country we should have an alternative to watching people we love suffer terribly..... the staff this evening have been fantastic and for the most part managed to keep him relatively pain free but he’s still suffering.

[nikkiboy]

Sorry for your troubles Tony, it's one of those subjects people don't talk about but there should be an alternative to watching someone die a slow and agonising death.

[Maverick]

Dad passed away on Saturday morning , it was a difficult end to his life , and one of the hardest things i’ve Ever had to watch. I loved him dearly and he leaves a massive hole in my life. I’ll cope and carry on because that’s what I told him i’d do. But it hurts.

We need to be able to give terminally ill people the choice of assissted dying, if they choose not then at least we’d have an option.

[Ginge]

Dad passed away on Saturday morning , it was a difficult end to his life , and one of the hardest things i’ve Ever had to watch. I loved him dearly and he leaves a massive hole in my life. I’ll cope and carry on because that’s what I told him i’d do. But it hurts.

We need to be able to give terminally ill people the choice of assissted dying, if they choose not then at least we’d have an option.

Absolutely agree with your last statement. Disgusting that people in this country can be prosecuted for helping someone to die.

About two years ago the sister of my gran found out she had months to live. Weeks later her husband was told the same news. So they planned to end their lives together and that's what they did, he went into his old workplace and "borrowed" something that produced carbon dioxiden and they hooked up a device that meant they would go to sleep together but not wake up.

They were found the next morning by one of their daughters, in bed together in each other's arms. The family knew it was going to happen, they weren't told when and great pains were made to ensure they had no involvement.

You can't tell me that sitting around waiting to die at seperate times is more preferable.

Anyway I'm waffling now. Sorry to hear about your dad.

[rabsmith2]

Sorry for your loss, it’s hard to get over a parent dying in my thoughts and prayers lad

[Maverick]

Thanks Ginge , it was 7 weeks from discovering a lump to dying. But the speed of wasting away was what killed me! We allow animals to go with dignity, to do any different is considered cruel. I’m going to the Labour Party conference for the first time this year, i’m Hoping to be able to speak to the shadow health secretary about get a national conversation started to give people a choice other than a morphine induced stupor. In my dads case the disease was moving faster than his pain killer so spent most of his time in pain and discomfort until they gave a huge increase in his medication.

I hope that when or if my time comes, I have a choice and my children don’t have to witness me wasting away in discomfort .

[WizardofozFan]

Thanks Ginge , it was 7 weeks from discovering a lump to dying. But the speed of wasting away was what killed me! We allow animals to go with dignity, to do any different is considered cruel. I’m going to the Labour Party conference for the first time this year, i’m Hoping to be able to speak to the shadow health secretary about get a national conversation started to give people a choice other than a morphine induced stupor. In my dads case the disease was moving faster than his pain killer so spent most of his time in pain and discomfort until they gave a huge increase in his medication.

I hope that when or if my time comes, I have a choice and my children don’t have to witness me wasting away in discomfort .

My sincere condolences Maverick, losing a loved one is tough and your father even worse I'm sure my friend. All I can say is time is a healer, we're all thinking of you at this awful time. Remember the amazing memories & how lucky you've been to have your dad in your life

Assisted suicide is never something that's going to get pushed through, rightly or wrongly. It's such a tough subject to decide yay or nay on. Going to a Labour conference is certainly not going to change anything but admire your fight.

[nikkiboy]

Dad passed away on Saturday morning , it was a difficult end to his life , and one of the hardest things i’ve Ever had to watch. I loved him dearly and he leaves a massive hole in my life. I’ll cope and carry on because that’s what I told him i’d do. But it hurts.

We need to be able to give terminally ill people the choice of assissted dying, if they choose not then at least we’d have an option.

Sorry for your loss Tony, my father died a few weeks ago so I know exactly what you are feeling.
Had to watch him suffer in pain at the end and it wrenches your guts out, as a civilised society there has to be a better way of caring for terminally ill people than pumping them full of drugs and waiting for them to die.

[rabsmith2]

Sorry for your loss Nikkiboy

[Maverick]

Dad passed away on Saturday morning , it was a difficult end to his life , and one of the hardest things i’ve Ever had to watch. I loved him dearly and he leaves a massive hole in my life. I’ll cope and carry on because that’s what I told him i’d do. But it hurts.

We need to be able to give terminally ill people the choice of assissted dying, if they choose not then at least we’d have an option.

Sorry for your loss Tony, my father died a few weeks ago so I know exactly what you are feeling.
Had to watch him suffer in pain at the end and it wrenches your guts out, as a civilised society there has to be a better way of caring for terminally ill people than pumping them full of drugs and waiting for them to die.

So sorry for your loss Nick , we need the conversation to happen, I agree there will be reservations and checks and balances required, but people should have a choice.

[ChrisW]

Been through it three times here in NL. Same story and heart breaking to see.

[Maverick]

Thanks Ginge , it was 7 weeks from discovering a lump to dying. But the speed of wasting away was what killed me! We allow animals to go with dignity, to do any different is considered cruel. I’m going to the Labour Party conference for the first time this year, i’m Hoping to be able to speak to the shadow health secretary about get a national conversation started to give people a choice other than a morphine induced stupor. In my dads case the disease was moving faster than his pain killer so spent most of his time in pain and discomfort until they gave a huge increase in his medication.

I hope that when or if my time comes, I have a choice and my children don’t have to witness me wasting away in discomfort .

My sincere condolences Maverick, losing a loved one is tough and your father even worse I'm sure my friend. All I can say is time is a healer, we're all thinking of you at this awful time. Remember the amazing memories & how lucky you've been to have your dad in your life

Assisted suicide is never something that's going to get pushed through, rightly or wrongly. It's such a tough subject to decide yay or nay on. Going to a Labour conference is certainly not going to change anything but admire your fight.

I was booked to go to the conference anyway before this, it takes a political decision to get the debate started , hoping the party I support can agree to start that debate , involve experts and make it a national debate and hopefully maybe a few years away we can put a policy to the people, just to increase the choices from a morphine induced stupor. To allow our loved ones to pass with dignity and less suffering.

[Maverick]

Been through it three times here in NL. Same story and heart breaking to see.

Jesus Christ , I wouldn’t know how to cope with having to do this three times. Currently clearing my dads home and trying to make decisions on what to keep, give away and bin! Hating every minute but receiving some fantastic help from family.

[ChrisW]

Been through it three times here in NL. Same story and heart breaking to see.

Jesus Christ , I wouldn’t know how to cope with having to do this three times. Currently clearing my dads home and trying to make decisions on what to keep, give away and bin! Hating every minute but receiving some fantastic help from family.

Remember the good times, what got us through the house clearing.

[dudley1975]

Sorry to hear the sad news


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[oche balboa]

So sorry to hear this. Best wishes to you & your family

[Mgt]

My condolences for your loss. Things like that are never easy. Hope you can give it a place and focus on the good memories.

[Maverick]

Thanks everyone , we are a close knit strong family , and are supporting each other through this. Getting through the funeral on the 27th is now the main focus. Have been at his house since it happened sorting things out. Have probably kept far too much stuff but there’s some things I just can’t throw away yet.